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didihearthereadyset:

So I accidentally said, “my crotch has a hole in it.” Instead of “my pants have a hole in them.” And this guy looked me dead in the eyes and whispered

"It’s called a vagina."

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sherrocked:

My little sister is a really pretty girl and she gets dick pics all the time from annoying boys, so being the girl she is, she started using them as blackmail.
She now has about 30 boys doing her bidding because one stepped out of line and she got someone to print out 500 copies of the photo and mailed it to his family.

My sister is 16 and she’s running a black mail Mafia.
She’s going places.

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aglaja:

besturlonhere:

you know what really gets my goat?

el chupacabra

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jiggawhat:

imboredwhatever:

omfg last year i had this roommate that randomly liked to practice giving birth for fun

I CANT BREATHE OFMG 

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pineapple-ninja:

theburningpassion:

pineapple-ninja:

I just spent $9 at mcdonalds lol
Large fries, 20 piece, and a large coke 😇

This is the ideal perspective of living life to the fullest

I’m quite content

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  • 2 hours ago
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